Postcard from Hibernation #1

Hi everyone!

I am greatly enjoying my hibernation, but thought I might send you a "postcard" now and then to say hello.

We've had a fun couple of months. In February we drove to southern California and paid a visit to Disneyland. So much fun!

Then, last month we were lucky enough to go on my husband's company ski trip to Tahoe. I love being within driving distance to all these cool places! (Don't know why the kids look so bummed out in this photo though. Too much snow?)

I promise it hasn't all been about fancy trips around here. I also discovered something new that's only 30 minutes from my house. The Alameda Point Antiques Faire! I could have spent hours wandering around this place, but probably would have gotten in lots of trouble. As it was, we fell in love with this antique farmhouse table. It took some budget rearranging (and a large delivery truck), but it came home with us!

I also made a lovely discovery on Etsy and purchased these two whimsical prints from The Black Apple. I love the colors and the vintage quality!

What else? Spring is here in northern California, so I was inspired to pull out the summer bedding last week.

I must admit that TJ Maxx helped me by selling those two blue ruffled pillows for $10 apiece on clearance!

I dug around and found my robin's eggs to add a little splash of color on my dresser.

And to finish it off, I painted our master bathroom Sherwin Williams' Comfort Grey. (And please note that when I say "master bathroom," it is in the loosest sense of the word. The only mastering that goes on in there is mastering our annoyance as we bump into each other trying to get ready at the same time!)

I have been having a wonderful time, and appreciate all your thoughtful comments and emails to me during my "hibernation." I hope you are all doing well too!

Do Bees Hibernate?

This was the question I typed into my Google window the other day. A strange one, to be sure. But one that has become important to me as I crafted this blog post in my head. (And, to answer your curiosity, some bees do hibernate over the winter, clustering together to generate heat. Don't ask me about the details; they are fuzzy at best!)

You see, like the bees, I am going into hibernation.

I thought about just calling it a mini-vacation. I also thought about stopping my blog altogether. Neither one seemed right. I have loved having this blog as a personal playground, a creative outlet in an otherwise suburban, husband- and kid-centered life. I don't want to cancel it, but I am also at a point where my "real" life is calling to me, louder and much more insistently than my blogging life.

It used to be that I was overflowing with ideas. Decorating, crafting, cooking, homemaking. I always had something new up my sleeve. But lately, since our move to California, I've been feeling a bit dry. My rental house is all set up, painted and decorated. At least for the immediate future, my work is done. We don't know how long we'll be here; my husband's job is stable and hopeful. His company is based here in northern California, and we've chosen to make the move here so that he can have every opportunity to learn and grow and strive. Until we know more about the next career steps, though, we don't want to buy another house...

...So, yes, it feels very uncertain and unknowable. I think we're looking at a couple of years here at least. Long enough that I know I have to put down roots. I can't just cruise through this period of life, closing my eyes, working on house projects and not leaving time for anything else, and hoping it will be over soon. I have to engage in it, live it, connect to it. And I also have these precious kids to think about. Nina is four and Henry is two, and I want to intentionally invest in these years with them, and not let them pass me by while I am pursuing other, more "important" things. (Please know I am not exercising judgement on anyone else's life with these statements. I just know my own personal pitfalls, and am trying to be honest about them.)

In essence, I feel like I am putting a part of my life in hibernation too. Turning inward, towards my family and my life here, fighting for survival through this winter-ish season in my life, hunkering down.

It's not that I will stop being creative, doing projects, loving the thrill of the thrift store hunt. I am sure I will poke (buzz?) my head in and out from time to time. If I work on a project, or discover some new craftiness, I will want to share it with you. But my buzzings will become much less frequent, for the foreseeable future anyway, and I felt you might want an explanation.

So, you see? Not just a simple bloggy break, but not a permanent departure, either. A hibernation. For an undetermined amount of time. (It's a good thing that some bees do hibernate, or else this analogy would have fallen apart a few paragraphs ago!)

Thanks for sticking with me all this time. I will miss you. Stay well.

Decorating a Nursery on the Cheap

Hey everyone! I am guest posting today over at Your Baby Booty, an awesome website and blog designed for new moms. I can't say how much I wish this tool had been around when I was trying to figure out what to buy for my first baby! Alas, now I can just share my thoughts on decorating a baby nursery on the cheap. At least I've got that skill down pat. Check it out!

I'll be back tomorrow with some more distraction decorating for you!

Can We Still Be Home for the Holidays?

[This post is dedicated to Edie of Life in Grace, who lost her home to fire a few days before Christmas. I can't imagine how you feel, and I pray your sense of home is restored, with much grace from God.]

I've been thinking a lot about the holiday season.

Christmas is my favorite time of year. Like most of us, I love the cozy nights by the fire, the excuses to see family, and the many special treats and traditions that we look forward to every December.

There's always something that bothers me, though. It starts to set in bright and early on December 26, and by January 2, it's full blown. The Let Down. Everyone talks about it, everyone fears it. I can't say why for the rest of you, but for me, here it is:

The holidays give us permission to value the things that are really important to us. We walk into a store and the songs are playing over the speakers: "Chestnuts roasting on an open fire," "There's no place like home for the holidays," "Since we've no place to go, Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow!" It's like our whole culture allows one big recess from the usual focus on achievement, acquiring, and conquering. We are told it's acceptable, even preferable, to sock in, cuddle up, turn to our families and friends, and allow that to be enough.

I know we have control over our own lives and we can choose what messages we allow to penetrate during the other 11 months of the year. We can sock in and cuddle up anytime we want to, right? But somehow it just feels like the hurdles are bigger, and that we have to defend our choices a little harder.

Does anyone else just feel a bit bummed about having to get back in the fight?

In an attempt to remind myself that "home for the holidays" doesn't have to end after Christmas, I posted this quote in my kitchen:

It reads:

Winter is the time for comfort. For good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand, and for a talk beside the fire. It is the time for home.

--Edith Sitwell, British poet

May your January have as many open fires, chestnuts, and comforts of home as your December.

I'm Back!

Hi everyone!

Long time, no see. How have you been? I hope your Thanksgiving was a good one! How have I been, you ask? Let me show you. I've been staring at this:

Yep, those are boxes. Yep, we moved. Again.

About six weeks ago we decided that a move was in the best interest of our family. It happened rather fast, and right before Thanksgiving we moved from the gorgeous 1930s Spanish Colonial (quite frankly, the more beautiful house I will ever live in!) to this:

It's a sweet and humble 1950s ranch in Lafayette, California. While I miss those stunning hardwood floors and amazing view in the old house, I can't deny that there are certain perks to this new place. Namely, this tree in our new backyard, which is just begging for a tire swing:

It's been an interesting ride so far. We did most of the move ourselves since it was only a distance of ten miles. Lots of sore muscles, all in the name of saving some money! However, our poor dog has no idea where he lives, and sometimes I wonder if the kids do either. (For instance, today Nina asked me if she could play in the basement. I had to remind her that we no longer have one. Hmm...)

I believe, though, that this was a good decision for our family. I am feeling remarkably settled, considering how much upheaval we have had in the past few months! And I've already been working on some house projects that I can't wait to show you.

I hope you all have a great weekend. I'll be back next week with some new material, and can't wait to reconnect!

Thank You!

Hi everyone...

Thank you so much for all your comments. Seriously. We all don't know each other in the "real" world, but it means so much to me that you would take the time to connect with someone in blogging-land who's having a hard time.

So, you'd all be proud of me. Today I wandered in to a little bookshop near my house and asked about their book club, which meets monthly. Think I'm going to try and attend next week if I can. I also have plans to go to a Baby Boot Camp session (although I have to admit that I'm scared of discovering how un-fit I am!) tomorrow. Someone I met at the park last week invited me, and said it would be a good way to meet other stay-at-home moms.

I don't want to make it sound like all my problems are solved, but I know I need to "get out there" to feel connected. So off I go.

And just because I simply can't put up a post without a photo, here's one taken of our little family before we left Colorado. It's a good reminder for me to count my blessings. Thank God we have each other! And I thank God for all of you, too.

The Deck. And also, I'm Homesick.

First of all, I want to be clear that I know I am incredibly blessed. The photos of our new deck will make you hate me.

We decided to rent in the short term because we knew nothing about the Bay area, and buying a house--blindly--scared us. The amazing thing is that we found a house that meets so many of our family's needs, and is beautiful to boot.

Our deck is pretty much the icing on the (already beautiful) cake.

Also, because I don't have to hang pictures and curtains and worry too much about furniture placement, the deck has been easy to set up. It's got a little sitting area, below:

...and a great eating area, with views of the bay.

I love it, and believe me, I know how lucky we are.

Now, the homesick part. We just moved very far away from our immediate family. They are in Ohio and Colorado, basically, with some in Georgia and Pennsylvania. I debated on whether or not to be honest here. I know some of you just come here for the home decorating stuff, and believe me, I don't blame you. Most of us have enough going on in our own lives, without adding strangers' problems to the mix.

But I can't just pop onto my blog and act like my life is perfect. I'm struggling these days. I miss my family. My husband used to work from home in Colorado, but now that we're in California he is commuting to the office every day. My kids are 4 years old and 20 months. I love them dearly but I think we are all just a bit lonely. Nina keeps talking about wanting to move back to our old house. Henry just wants to break everything, as sweet as he is. My sister, brother-in-law and precious niece are left behind in Denver. I didn't even know who to write down for my daughter's preschool "in case of emergency" person, the one who could just drop everything and come to rescue us at a moment's notice, that "just down the street" person.  Adjusting is hard.

I always knew it would be hard. I didn't expect perfection once we moved here, but I couldn't post "perfect" photos of my "perfect" life and "perfect" house and pretend that things are, indeed, perfect. I don't expect you to solve my problems, because I know we've all got them. (But please don't say anything mean unless you want me to be a puddle on the floor.)

But like I said, it's real life. We can have beautiful houses, but we need friends and family to make them home. I know those things will come, with time. But three weeks in to our California transplant, it's pretty lonely around here. And I couldn't pretend otherwise. So forgive me.

At least you know I'll have plenty of time for house projects! I'll be back in a few days with more...

From the Road

Hi all!

Well, we are officially on our way to California. Thank you all SO much for your kind wishes, prayers and comments! I won't lie: it's been a rough couple of weeks. I know you all know what I am talking about. Lots of sleepless nights, bickering, and crankiness. And I am not even talking about the kids.

We have had many "picnics" in our empty family room, with boxes as picnic blankets.

And I don't think that you've lived until you've seen the entire contents of your life, in boxes, on your driveway.

But luckily all that is behind us. We have been on the road for two days now, and we have another full day of driving before we pull into the San Francisco Bay area on Wednesday.

Before I bore you with more photos of us in sub-par hotels and McDonald's play areas, I thought I might show you a few projects that I worked on before we packed up and moved out of Colorado. So, stay tuned over the next few weeks for those posts! And I can't wait to show you our new house in California!

Once I actually locate the camera, that is.

Still Alive

Do you ever have days when it's just a relief to get up in the morning?

What I mean is this: Do you have those times when you've been tossing and turning in bed, half-dreaming of all you have to do the next day? Panicking that you won't get it all done? So, by the time your clock reaches a semi-normal time, you pop out of bed and you're just so glad to be doing, instead of worrying?

Not that I know anything about that.

We are living amidst boxes right now, and just hoping that somehow all our stuff makes it to California! The moving truck comes on Friday, and we officially start our drive west on Sunday. I can't decide if I feel sad, excited, scared, hopeful or just tired. I could practically create a whole new set of Seven Dwarfs over here.

Just thought I would check in to say that I am still alive. I do have some posts that I had planned before all this moving took over my life, so maybe I will entertain you with those sometime soon. But mostly I'll just be packing and trying to keep my kids away from the masking tape.

Hope you all are doing well! :)

Sold!

Here's a hint about what we will soon be doing...

See all those boxes on that truck? That will be my life, all packed up, although loaded onto a slightly bigger rig.

We sold our house!

We've actually been in negotiations with the buyers for almost two weeks, and I haven't wanted to say anything until the deal was more finalized. But it looks like it's going to happen! I am so relieved, and so freaked out.

We don't have a house in California yet, because we wanted to make sure the sale of our house was certain before we committed to anything. Oh, and did I mention that we have to be out by August 28th?

God help me! (And if I'm not around too much over the next few weeks, you'll know why.)

For Sale!

Well, it's official. This sign appeared in my front yard yesterday:

I apologize for being so MIA lately. We decided to sell (as opposed to rent to tenants) our house earlier this week, and our days have been filled with getting-the-house-ready-to-sell types of activities.

There I was, thinking "There can't be anything the realtor would want to change about my house to make it sell faster!" Ha. Ha Ha. Pride comes before the fall, my friends! Turns out there's a whole list of things that needed to happen, in order to maximize the square footage and various other features of this house. So much of my stuff has now been moved to the basement, in order to make the rooms look larger, that I am surprised my husband hasn't broken something. Either a bone, or maybe one of my knickknacks, out of frustration.

In the good news department, we already had our first showing this morning and our realtor seems hopeful that we won't sit on the market too long. I'm not holding my breath, though.

Mostly because I am so tired from all these house projects, I might pass out.

Our Big News!

It must be fate.

Today I got my new issue of House Beautiful magazine, and on the cover was a question I've been pondering a lot lately: "Is Small the New Big?"

Now, I don't know for sure what House Beautiful has to say on this topic, but I'm crossing my fingers that it's true! The reason?

We are moving.

To San Francisco.

My husband's company is based in the Bay area, and about a month ago we got an offer to move there. I probably don't have to tell you that some of my first thoughts had to do with housing. Can we sell our Colorado house? (Maybe.) Can we afford to live in California? (Perhaps, if we do some major budget restructuring). Do we rent a house in California? (Probably, at least for the first year while we learn about the area.) Do we buy a house in California? (Eventually, maybe, if we can find the right fixer-upper!) Can we live in a smaller house? (The answer better be yes to that one, since moving to a more expensive market means that downsizing is a necessity for us.)

Do I have the energy to start all over, with a new house to love and decorate? (Ah...YES! That's an easy one.)

So, strap on your seat belts! The rest of the summer will be all about packing, house-hunting in California, holding a massive garage sale, and selling or renting our house in Colorado. I might go crazy. Join me, won't you?

Today's Creative Blog: I Love It!

Have you ever visited Today's Creative Blog? It is an absolutely fantastic place to find so many crafty ideas out there. I found it early in my blogging days and whenever I need a homey-type inspiration, that's where I go!

Just mentioning it because I was recently featured as a Flashback. Whoopee! I just love being connected to all you creative peeps.

More soon. It's snowing here in Colorado. Yep, you heard me right. So I am holed up in the house with my kiddos and who knows what might result from that!

Mother's Day Wrap Up

Hi everyone! Did you have a good weekend?

However you celebrated Mother's Day, I hope it was a good one. I got to spend mine with my two favorite little people. See them below? We went to brunch and had a great day! But does anyone know how to get a three-year-old to smile at the camera?

And my favorite big person (aka husband Brent) took great care of me on Mother's Day. Check out my new gift!
It's this adorable purse kind of thing from Lucky Brand. The straps are long enough that it can cross over my chest instead of the usual juggling-Henry-on-one-arm-and-slugging-my-purse-around-on-the-other-arm routine. I highly recommend it if you are in the market for a fancy new way to drag around your junk.

I'll see you later this week...I promise I'll get back to the regularly scheduled house stuff!

Spring Break!

Henry and I are tired.

Actually, to be precise, I predict we will be tired. Nina is on spring break this week (from her grueling two-mornings-a-week at preschool). So we're off to do some fun family things, maybe take a few Colorado day trips, and generally enjoy the freedom.

I'll be back next week! In the meantime, Happy Spring!

Art and Way Talented Friends

Some of you asked about this photo, below, and the unique piece of artwork that sits on top of the desk in my guest room. I am so glad you asked! It's one of my very favorite pieces.

Remember Sarah? She's "my first spouse," as I called her in this post. We lived together in Casablanca, Morocco, from 1999-2000 and taught English and traveled to France and Spain and did all sorts of pre-husband, pre-baby, pre-settled-down types of things.

Ah, yes. Here we are today, very settled down. Sarah and her husband and adorable son just visited Colorado for a little mountain vacation, and we spent a few days with them. Love!

Anyway, back to the painting! When Brent and I got married, Sarah painted that canvas for me as a wedding gift. It's our love story in French. How cool is that? French was significant to us because when Sarah and I lived in Morocco, she spoke it fluently. I stumbled my way through it and managed to get to the post office or buy some fruit from a street vendor, but that's about it. Nevertheless, a good portion of our overseas life was conducted in French. Want to know the English translation? Here it is (and yes, I had to send Sarah a photo of the painting to get her to translate it for me!):

Once upon a time, there was a boy, wearing glasses and adorable curly hair, I love the way he made me laugh...There was something special about her, the way her blue eyes sparkle, her beautiful smile...Now, standing before friends and family, everything else disappears as we declare our love...forever.

Yep. Told you. Now head on over to Sarah's blog, The Life of Blights, and tell her how amazing she is! :)

Thank You!

OK, hold on.

Nope, that's not it. Let me get this thing in focus.

Oh crap. Where's my head?

Alright, well, you get the idea.

Seriously, thank you so much for your comments regarding my last post. It was so helpful to hear where you all are coming from. If any of you have ever wrestled with some of these blogging issues (and from your comments, I know you do!), I highly recommend reading everyone's responses to me! So gracious, so kind, and so honest. Just what I needed!

So here's my takeaway from all this: I am still going to blog about my home and decorating and crafting, with a splash of my "real" life thrown in there so you know I have dirty dishes on the counter, most likely just pushed out of the way for a photo of something I've spray painted. I am going to let myself off the hook for feeling like I have to respond to every comment and generally be "super-blogger." I am going to be happy that I get to share my ideas with you all, and that you enjoy coming here and tweaking my ideas to fit your own home.

And most of all I am going to communicate how much I appreciate that you do come here, and that you share your day with me. As I read your comments all weekend, I felt a growing sense of freedom and excitement in sharing more of my projects with you, so watch out! It's amazing what a little grace can do, huh? Good life lesson for me, too, actually...

So thank you, thank you, thank you...from the bottom of my crafty little heart.

Interrupting Myself for Some Advice

I interrupt my usual house ramblings for this post!

I don't know enough about the blogging world to answer this question for myself. When I started "Buzzings of a Queen Bee" in August of 2008, I had lots of ideas and house projects to share. (I still do, don't worry!) But I always believed that an important part of blogging was not just the posts I write, but what I contribute to the community as a whole: read other bloggers' posts, leave comments generously, build relationships (strange as that sounds since few of us have met each other, but you know what I mean!).

However, since August of 2008, I have had Baby #2, and the somewhat predictable life I once led has gotten chopped up into lots of tiny moments of my day. This leaves little time for projects and even less time to be the commenting, responsive blogger I once was.

I blame these cute little people:

And sometimes I blame this, undeniably less cute, mountain of laundry:

And I find myself, when I do have free time, being drawn to the very projects that drive this blog:
Problem is, that leaves very little time to give to you, my reader, in terms of visiting your blogs when you visit mine, leaving comments so you know I care enough to be there, etc.

So my question is this: Which is more important? To be an on-the-ball blogger with lots of time to visit and reciprocate to all of you? Or spend my time doing the things that you like to read about when you come here? Which is more important to you as my readers? To have that personal connection with me? Or to be able to come here and maybe get a new, fun idea for your own house? Is it enough for you to just get the house ideas and inspiration? What really draws you to someone's blog to begin with?

OK, now that I have laid that question out there, I ask you to be kind to me! This has been on my mind for awhile now, because in a perfect world, I would have enough time for everything: my family, my responsibilities, my projects, my real-life friends and my blogging-friends. It really bothers me when I read your sweet comments (and I really do read each one) and I know I just don't have the time to be able to respond to you all. So I worry I am hurting and offending people and that's the last thing I want to do. (Yep, I also over-think things, in case you can't tell!)

Have a great weekend, and if you've gotten to the end of this post and you still have the energy to share your thoughts with me, I applaud you! :)

Merry Christmas!

I am sorry the posts have been so few and far between this month. Blame it on the holidays! (And the home improvement project that we foolishly decided to take on three weeks before Christmas...) But I promise I will be back in January with some good stuff!

In the meantime, have a wonderful holiday. I will see you back here after the New Year!

My New Favorite Christmas CD

The day after Thanksgiving we love to drive up to the little town of Estes Park, Colorado, where they hold an annual Christmas parade just after sunset. The lights of the parade, the pretty floats and Christmas characters, and the music is just magical!

We all bundle up, as you can see!

This year we wandered into a little shop and discovered Peregrin Road, a local acoustic band. They were just sitting there, live, playing music from their Christmas CD, which I bought on the spot! It's a beautiful mix of guitar, Irish whistle (my favorite) and other things this non-musical person cannot identify.

All I can tell you is that I've been listening to this CD non-stop. Although Frank, Bing, Tony and the rest of the crew will always have top billing at my house, sometimes you just need a little variety in your Christmas music! I love to play this during my (few) moments of peace, or at night when the kids are in bed.

I promise I don't know these guys, and they are not paying me to say this! I just found something that brings me a little calmness and peace during the Christmas season, and wanted to share. Their CD sells on Amazon, or you can go to their website directly to listen and download. If you have a few minutes, I highly recommend it!

Have a great weekend!